I write big lists and I cannot lie

I am a list writer. I am I am.

Yesterday I converted my big giant list into a categorised list under different topic headings on separate pages.

Like: things to do around the house, things to do in the garden/outside, things to do with George/diabetes, and dreams/aspirations. I had to make a Dreams and Aspirations page as these fill up my list and they mean I can never ever scratch everything off my list as they are often longer term targets. Or near impossible targets, like find a cure for our son's Type One Diabetes but you never know.

I have an invisible in-my-head list that I run through every night that I don't bother writing down: kept my son alive for another day - check,  set the alarms to keep our son alive through the night - check. Complete with a little spider-graph of yes/no questions that probably stems from doing too many magazine questionnaires when I was younger, the ones that promised to solve all your problems with some simple yes or no flow charts and a paragraph analogy at the end: Have you changed your sons nappy? Yes/No. If yes, proceed to putting his pyjamas on. If No, find the baby wipes and a nappy. Put nappies on the shopping list.

Last night my husband asked me who my heroes were. We were talking about Politics and I said that none of my heroes were politicians. They wont go down in history as heroes. Except with the exception of Winston Churchill, can I name any remarkable, inspirational politicians who changed the world for the greater good in the UK? You, dear reader, might be able to come up with your own list, but I can't.  Can I name ones who seem to have let us down ... absolutely. 

I found this image here

What is this era going to be remembered for? What are they writing as our current history? Putting greed and the insatiable material desires of the individual above the greater good, avoiding paying tax which means the NHS suffers, oh, and leaving a layer of plastic in the Earth's mantle, maybe? 

As the UK politicians are failing to be inspiring leaders I simply turn away from them and don't follow them on a daily basis, as that is introducing unnecessary negativity into my consciousness every day. Instead I find inspirational people, like Tshering Tobgay from Bhutan, talking here on Youtube about his country who prioritises their people's happiness above everything else and get this: offers the people free electricity.

I found this image here along with a controversial linked article about people who want to disrupt the way of life of Bhutan, with the westernised author stating he would prefer the chaos. Interestingly putting the link onto Tshering's video is trying to discredit an inspiring man and destroy his country's vision with an American viewpoint, and look how successful Westernising nations with the Debt Culture and the World Bank has been in other cultures...

Tony Robbins. I listen to that big booming voice when I'm getting ready in the bathroom as its the only time I have to do it, but its 'found time', and boy when that big booming voice offers some motivation it really sinks in. I used to listen to Brooke Castillo's Life Coach School podcast while commuting to work. I found the time. Everyone has 24 hours in the day, dont tell me you 'dont have time' to do something, if its important to you, make the time, stay awake an extra hour and suddenly you have the time! Thanks for that pearl  of wisdom Tony and Brooke!

I found this image here

It helps me stay positive, finding the good guys out there and celebrating their victories. Because I fight every night to keep my precious son alive and I want the world he grows up in to be a good place. We have a choice, every single day, on how we live. Good or bad, to act with greedy intent or  with generosity, it all comes down to choice. There is categorically no necessity to choose to be greedy, hateful or act with malice in this world. To steal from the poor to line the pockets of the wealthy. To hurt other human beings. Why would you choose to be that way? Every minute of every day, you can choose how you are going to be. Why would you choose to be horrible to other people?

And yet all the time, people do. Its mind boggling.

our son, trying his little heart out

Here on the farm, we are trying to put something good into the world. We trialled a campsite this year, and allowed an obstacle course to be built on the grounds which is run by a not for profit gym, and benefits the health and well being of everyone that uses it. One of our neighbours reported us to the council with their concerns and has effectively shut it down. Instead of just asking us directly whether we knew we should have planning permission, which is a bit strange, don't you think? But meh, I'm sure they had the best of intentions. We thought putting a few posts into the ground wouldn't need hundreds of pounds spent in applying for permission from the local council, especially as we make no money from the course and it had all the right risk assessments and insurances. But now that we know, we will endeavour to set things right so we can keep this fantastic thing running and changing lives.

We want to ensure that we can raise money in some form, to help find a cure for Type One Diabetes, our son battles this condition every single day of his young life, and we want to help other children, including those with forms of disability have a positive experience when they stay here. Already this year, we have had positive feedback from families who have stayed with us, whose children have had ADHD, learning disabilities and autism.

That's what we are all about, making positive changes starting in our own community, and hoping it has a positive knock on effect to inspire other people to change their world too. If you can make a difference, then do it, don't wait for someone else, you are the person that makes a difference in your world.

And don't let naysayers stop you. They may knock you down, but you damn well get back up again and you put one foot in front of the other and you keep walking towards your dream. I get a maximum of three hours sleep in a row, then I wake up to treat my son. Every single night. For years to come. Try it for a week.

i found this image here

I don't let my son's disability define our lives. We are not broken, we are not defeated, we are champions of Type One Diabetes, every day he stays alive we have won another day.

I burn the candle at both ends, depriving myself of much needed sleep, to make sure I can make small steps each day towards reaching our goals. Taking ten minutes where I can during the day to type another sentence on a planning application or a business plan, or, dare I ever, work on my own personal dream of being a writer, hah! Damn right I will.

Which leads me to another inspirational guy: Earl, "I made a list of everything bad I've ever done and one by one I'm gonna make up for all my mistakes. I'm just trying to be a better person." He wrote his list to change the world, and I'm going to keep writing mine. 

It always seems impossible until its done. Then you scratch it off and another darn thing gets added to the bottom of the list. Like remembering to buy nappies. Because through it all, you've got to laugh.

i found this image here

To answer my husband's question I will finish with a shout out to some of my heroes: any of you performing any sort of caring-based role, right now. Nurses, Doctors, Home-carers, parents, you're doing an amazing job, and thank you from the bottom of my own broken heart, stitched together with good intentions. May love and happiness find their way to you.